Saturday, February 25, 2006

The sad truth about online friend boards...and I'm not talking about "Hung Up"

Sitting here tonight I realized a great truth about myself. ALL of my friends have more friends than I do right now... what the &@*^!? Granted, I was never the BMOC and certainly didn't hang with the A crowd in high school. I chose the path less traveled and fluttered in and out of the B, C, D and on occassion A crowds. There were far too many interesting people to just sit back and soak in the company of a few select members. No no. Not for me. I did carry the closest people close to my heart and have kept up with them as best as I can as I've grown older. But now technology has caught up with me and like a preoccupied man walking into one of those fresh fish market's near the wharf... I got slapped in the face with a flounder of reality!

My only consolation is in knowing that most of these friends have "friends" who are not truly friends but are simply "acquaintances" who they have gotten to know over the years.

Perhaps this means I've been too picky and not permitted my "suburb" friends to join me in the "downtown" of my life. That's it... it's open bar at Tommy's and EVERYONE'S WELCOME! God dammit... join me on Myspace!

Saturday, February 18, 2006

And the #1 most overplayed song on Myspace is...

...ARGHH... Madonna hasn't been this popular since 1984. What the hell is up with every queen, sorority girl, and certified public accountant posting Hung Up (song or video) on their Myspace page. Ridiculous.

On that note, I despise the music playing on Myspace. When I do check it - and I do often because like the inane addiction to The Sims when it debuted, I have to see who in the world is online all the time now - I get inundated with techno beats or horribly depressing songs that make me want to alert the nearest suicide hotline of these pages.

Operator: Suicide Hotline, how can I help you?
Me: Yes, there is a Myspace user who is playing Cinderella's "Don't Know What You've Got (Till It's Gone)".
Operator: And the username sir?
Me: MorbidlySadAngelofDarknessinaPitofDespair247
Operator: Thank you sir, we're sending a rescue unit to that location immediatly.
Me: Just doing my civic duty.

So annoying.

Friday, February 10, 2006

Pick a "friend" place and stick to it...or YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MANY PERSONALIZED DESK ACCESSORIES!

So, my latest rant involves the frustration that I have over too many "friend-networking" websites. I had Friendster and everyone was on there. Then everyone started using Myspace so I went over there... I NEED TO BE CONNECTED! But then people switch back and forth and confuse the living b'jesus out of me and now I'm floating in "friend-network" hell. (Little none fact, Myspace and Friendster actuall co-exist on Dante's fourth level of hell... read the book.)

Anyhow, I'm now focusing on Myspace... if Friendster send me a little hello via email now and then I will take it as a lovely gesture and move on.

This attitude has worked for me since I switched from a Hotmail account to one on Gmail about three months ago. Do I love Gmail? No... but I'm courting it. Gmail gives me FAR FEWER "service interruptions" than Hotmail ever did so I'm good for now. Is the interface dreamy? As Kenneth Cole is my witness "No!"

I'm a little convinced that there is one guy at MSN whose job it is to make sure that Hotmail kicks in "service interruptions" periodically just to see if the members will react. It works like this... no reaction, no members are trying to log on... reaction, Hotmail is thrilled that people are aggressively trying to log into their account to see if Lillian Vernon has sent them a new catalog update. YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MANY PERSONALIZED DESK ACCESSORIES!

Anyhow, enough ranting. My friend Mike is touring with Utah Shakes educational tour of Macbeth. The van is amazing and I know he's frustrated and wishes that he wasn't trapped within its confines, but it is a SUPER COOL VAN! Check it out at his blog.

That's it for me tonight. Sorry I wasn't funnier. It'll come back to me... I just need 8 glasses of water, two lemon rinds, and a teaspoon of pepper and I'll have flushed this bitterness RIGHT out of my system. Ciao!